Starting Over

Long time no see

Let’s try this again.

It’s been a while since i’ve been “creative” (if you even want to call it that)- i’ve tried the whole “online business” thing- and failed. And failed again. And failed again.

I realized quickly that the idea of making money online may sound nice and flashy; but it just ain’t for me- and certainly isn’t for everyone. And that’s okay.

It took me a while to see that and give myself grace through all of this. I moved far away from home, gave it my best shot- and in the end I learned a ton and came to the conclusion that it wasn’t for me.

So here I am- “starting over” if you will. Using this platform just as a creative outlet- no real topics or focus, not trying to “sell” anything. Just writing and whoever wants to read along is more than welcome.

A little bit about my current situation- I recently re-enrolled in school and going back to be a Physical Therapist Assistant (2 year program), while also bartending at two different places 6-7 days per week. I still train damn near every day, with no set “goals” at the moment other than trying to feel my best physically and more importantly mentally.

You see, the last year+ has been some of the hardest times I have had mentally; experiencing a plethora of emotion and some pretty hard times. Unsure of my future. Unsure of myself. Feeling myself drifting through life and kind of lost a lot of the time. Feeling numb a lot of the time. In a “rut” with no clear plan on getting out. I found myself comparing myself to everyone and everything and feeling behind in life.

I didn’t cope with these feelings the best way- and most of the time I just pushed everything deep into my brain and hoped they would go away. I would just pick up another shift at work, drink, smoke or keep myself busy until I forgot about it.

Through this I have learned that busy is the enemy. Busy is where all of my growth and potential goes to die. I did not give myself any free time or any space to be myself, I would just work, work, work and numb myself to forget what I was dealing with mentally.

So, long story short here I am. “Starting Over” - writing about life, what I am studying in school, and even some lessons I learn or funny stories I hear while I am bartending (there are lots of them)

Join along for the ride

-Adam